如果當初沒有相遇，或許我不會是現在的我。
在你的世界裡，我笑過，痛過。
如今，滿身疲憊，帶著自己的影子默默走出你的世界。
不會再為你掉眼淚，
不會再傻傻等你的電話，
不會再苦苦求著你不要離開。
愛若卑微，便不再是愛；
愛若疼痛，就不叫愛。
Tuesday, September 30, 2014
還愛嗎？
Saturday, September 27, 2014
Appreciate your life, you are a Buddha
Credit from Facebook, The Power of Nam Myoho Renge Kyo
In Buddhism, appreciation is for our own life. We strive to appreciate the essence of our life, whatever we are going through at the moment. Learning appreciation is difficult, because our society always teaches us about good and bad. If we have the things we want we are happy, if we don't have them, we begrudge our lives. Two of the "Fourteen Slanders" that prevent us from becoming happy are :1. A mistaken view of life - we don't know who we are
2. Too much attachment to material things
We do not live in harmony with our true nature, and we are swayed by the opinions and thoughts of those outside of us. We embrace our mistaken identities so deeply that they become our reality.
Appreciation does not refer to things outside of yourself.
Appreciate your own life first. Appreciate when you fail. Appreciate when you try and try again and still fail. Appreciate when you embarrass yourself.
2. Too much attachment to material things
We do not live in harmony with our true nature, and we are swayed by the opinions and thoughts of those outside of us. We embrace our mistaken identities so deeply that they become our reality.
Appreciation does not refer to things outside of yourself.
Appreciate your own life first. Appreciate when you fail. Appreciate when you try and try again and still fail. Appreciate when you embarrass yourself.
OUR FUNDAMENTAL PROBLEM IS THAT WE ARE UNHAPPY.
So how do we turn it around? APPRECIATE who you are. You are a BUDDHA. You are the best thing that ever appeared on this whole planet. If you believe there is nothing you cannot do with your life, then there IS nothing you cannot do.
To believe that you can do anything is to bring your life into harmony.
To chant Nam-myoho-renge-kyo is to put yourself in harmony.
But it comes from appreciating your own life.
When your life is falling apart, try and chant in that moment to appreciate your own life. If you are in harmony, it will turn around. Our life has unbelievable power and wisdom, but we do not trust ourselves and let it come forth. We always look for validation outside and we'll never get it. If we validate ourselves, we will be able to influence everything around us.
So how do we turn it around? APPRECIATE who you are. You are a BUDDHA. You are the best thing that ever appeared on this whole planet. If you believe there is nothing you cannot do with your life, then there IS nothing you cannot do.
To believe that you can do anything is to bring your life into harmony.
To chant Nam-myoho-renge-kyo is to put yourself in harmony.
But it comes from appreciating your own life.
When your life is falling apart, try and chant in that moment to appreciate your own life. If you are in harmony, it will turn around. Our life has unbelievable power and wisdom, but we do not trust ourselves and let it come forth. We always look for validation outside and we'll never get it. If we validate ourselves, we will be able to influence everything around us.
NO MATTER WHERE MY LIFE IS AT, I WILL CHANT WITH THE DETERMINATION THAT I WILL TURN THIS SITUATION AROUND WITHIN ONE MONTH. I WILL TAKE THE RESPONSIBILITY TO MAKE IT HAPPEN, AND IN THAT ONE MONTH, I WILL CREATE THE BIGGEST BENEFIT OF MY LIFE.
To turn your life around in one month:
1. Perceive the truth of your life.
2. Take responsibility for creating the biggest benefit you have ever had
3. Everything begins and ends with you: the principal of Kyochi Myogo* is the oneness of the person and the law. When you chant, you and the law become one.
Nam-myoho-renge-kyo encompasses everything in the universe. Chant that your life and your goal become one. You are the centre of the universe. Chant Nam-myoho-renge-kyo for the harmony of your life. Chant to perceive your own truth.
We usually think of appreciation as something outside of us. We appreciate our possessions or what someone does for us. But in Buddhism, appreciation is for our own life. We strive to appreciate the essence of our life, whatever we are going through in the moment.
We are all programmed from a very early age - by our families, and teachers, TV etc to believe that we are a certain person. But Buddhism says that we have an incorrect view of life. Our goal as Buddhists is to develop a correct view of our life. Nichiren Daishonin said; "He who perceives the greatness of his life is a Buddha. He who doesn't is a fool." Chant to realize that you are the Buddha just as you are. Nam-Myoho-Renge-Kyo gives you the opportunity to perceive who you truly are. When you perceive who you are, you will naturally impact your environment.
It is not easy to appreciate your life, because your life does not want to appreciate itself. Just try chanting daimoku for fifteen minutes exclusively focusing on appreciating your life. Your mind will get distracted and you will think about everything but appreciation. But strive to stay focused on appreciation. Just as you are.
In our minds we judge our lives. We see part of our self as good and part as bad. We believe we have to push everything to the positive side to be happy. But you cannot do that. You are just who you are. There is no such thing as Good Buddha, Bad Buddha. There is only the Buddha, just as you are.
1. Perceive the truth of your life.
2. Take responsibility for creating the biggest benefit you have ever had
3. Everything begins and ends with you: the principal of Kyochi Myogo* is the oneness of the person and the law. When you chant, you and the law become one.
Nam-myoho-renge-kyo encompasses everything in the universe. Chant that your life and your goal become one. You are the centre of the universe. Chant Nam-myoho-renge-kyo for the harmony of your life. Chant to perceive your own truth.
We usually think of appreciation as something outside of us. We appreciate our possessions or what someone does for us. But in Buddhism, appreciation is for our own life. We strive to appreciate the essence of our life, whatever we are going through in the moment.
We are all programmed from a very early age - by our families, and teachers, TV etc to believe that we are a certain person. But Buddhism says that we have an incorrect view of life. Our goal as Buddhists is to develop a correct view of our life. Nichiren Daishonin said; "He who perceives the greatness of his life is a Buddha. He who doesn't is a fool." Chant to realize that you are the Buddha just as you are. Nam-Myoho-Renge-Kyo gives you the opportunity to perceive who you truly are. When you perceive who you are, you will naturally impact your environment.
It is not easy to appreciate your life, because your life does not want to appreciate itself. Just try chanting daimoku for fifteen minutes exclusively focusing on appreciating your life. Your mind will get distracted and you will think about everything but appreciation. But strive to stay focused on appreciation. Just as you are.
In our minds we judge our lives. We see part of our self as good and part as bad. We believe we have to push everything to the positive side to be happy. But you cannot do that. You are just who you are. There is no such thing as Good Buddha, Bad Buddha. There is only the Buddha, just as you are.
BEING A BUDDHA DOES NOT MEAN YOU ARE PERFECT. IT MEANS YOU ALWAYS TURN THE NEGATIVE INTO A BENEFIT.
We are all just Buddha, and sometimes we do terrible things. Good and bad exist because we are human beings. The only thing our stupidity proves is that we are human, and there is nothing wrong with that. Being a Buddha means that we take the negative and turn it into benefit.
We need to find out how wonderful and powerful our life is. We can do it in one night if we really appreciate our self. Appreciation does not mean that you accept the circumstances. Again, it is not about something outside of you.
What does it mean to appreciate another person? It means that you have no judgments about them. No matter what their condition, you will do anything for that person's happiness. Don't use anger as a form of judgment. It is fine to get angry, but don't judge another person’s life just because today you are feeling anger towards them.
We are all just Buddha, and sometimes we do terrible things. Good and bad exist because we are human beings. The only thing our stupidity proves is that we are human, and there is nothing wrong with that. Being a Buddha means that we take the negative and turn it into benefit.
We need to find out how wonderful and powerful our life is. We can do it in one night if we really appreciate our self. Appreciation does not mean that you accept the circumstances. Again, it is not about something outside of you.
What does it mean to appreciate another person? It means that you have no judgments about them. No matter what their condition, you will do anything for that person's happiness. Don't use anger as a form of judgment. It is fine to get angry, but don't judge another person’s life just because today you are feeling anger towards them.
Appreciation has three qualities:
No matter what happens, you do not betray your dreams, your goals or yourself.
No matter what happens, you do not make any judgments about yourself.
No matter what (unhappy) situation is in your life, you must turn it around.
IT IS UNACCEPTABLE TO BE IN A PLACE WHERE YOU ARE DEPRESSED - this must be our fundamental attitude. If you are angry, make it a function of the Buddha. Whatever quality is fundamental to your life, chant to appreciate it and you will bring forth unbelievable Power.
No matter what happens, you do not betray your dreams, your goals or yourself.
No matter what happens, you do not make any judgments about yourself.
No matter what (unhappy) situation is in your life, you must turn it around.
IT IS UNACCEPTABLE TO BE IN A PLACE WHERE YOU ARE DEPRESSED - this must be our fundamental attitude. If you are angry, make it a function of the Buddha. Whatever quality is fundamental to your life, chant to appreciate it and you will bring forth unbelievable Power.
Excerpts from Guidance by Mr. SONODA’S from the International District Meeting 30/11/2000
x
朋友
嘿～你知道吗？
最近我多了一位知心朋友，我们一起出来吃东西聊天，
感觉很棒～
我已经很久没有这样的感觉了。
自从中学毕业，大家各分东西，就再也没什么联络。
加上很多都没有在这里发展。
至于学院的朋友，更加没什么联络，因为大家都来自于不同的地方。
现在都过得很充实，再也不用整天都呆在家，
不是睡觉就是看电视，不然就是上上网。
加上现在有自己的车，要去哪里都行。
S小姐，谢谢你～
你听我诉苦，听我讲故事，约我出来我聊天吃饭，
让我感觉到我并不寂寞。
谢谢你丫～（给你一个赞 ^^）
最近我多了一位知心朋友，我们一起出来吃东西聊天，
感觉很棒～
我已经很久没有这样的感觉了。
自从中学毕业，大家各分东西，就再也没什么联络。
加上很多都没有在这里发展。
至于学院的朋友，更加没什么联络，因为大家都来自于不同的地方。
现在都过得很充实，再也不用整天都呆在家，
不是睡觉就是看电视，不然就是上上网。
加上现在有自己的车，要去哪里都行。
S小姐，谢谢你～
你听我诉苦，听我讲故事，约我出来我聊天吃饭，
让我感觉到我并不寂寞。
谢谢你丫～（给你一个赞 ^^）
感情？幸福？累了？
一段感情的开始……
有人会想用承诺去套牢一个人；
有人会想用行动去感动一个人；
有人会想用甜言蜜语去迷惑一个人。
然而，这个年纪的我（24岁），会害怕给承诺……
经历过失败的爱情，受过伤害。
所以害怕给，也害怕接受。
可是对它还是有一丝丝的期待，对感情还是有一股脑的热情，
想要表达出来让对方知道。
想想当初那股傻劲，其实很幸福。
自己为了这份感情执着过，
曾经为了彼此努力，但却不后悔这样付出，
这也是爱情令人着迷的地方。
在付出的同时，我们也得到了快乐，
只要看到对方轻轻一笑，心里就觉得很满足，
这一切努力都得到了一个小小的回报，就足够了。
其实，现在我有点害怕再去爱，
当初对爱情的那股期待的心情，
渐渐消失……
看到一段文字：
幸福是懂得原谅才开始的；
咖啡是一种容易上瘾的饮料；
感情是一种很难拒绝的吗啡，
一旦爱上就很难戒掉。
这段话说得蛮有道理的，
以前不喝咖啡的我，最近深深地爱上它。
我有3段感情（K先生），
第1段有3年，他是我在学会里透过朋友认识的。
我跟他经历了很多，虽然不同校，但是我们都会一起做功课，
他也是我的小老师，在课业上帮了我不少，所以那一年，我的功课进步很多。
在KK念书的时候，因为彼此念不同科系，
要一起讨论功课有点困难，大家的科目不一样，
我只好自己努力，加把劲！
后来因为没办法升上第二学年，我放弃了学业，回到家乡，
我们就这样分隔两地。
渐渐地，因为分隔两地，彼此的感情变淡，就这样选择分开。
第2段有接近2年（A先生）（1年11个月吧），
他是我哥的朋友，也是我的同事，
他很疼我，也很照顾我，但是我真的很抱歉，伤害了他……
对不起……（这段就不多说了……）
至于第3段（C先生），
是最短的一段，只有短短的两个星期，却是我最深刻的一段。
（也是我第一次会向妈妈提起的一段）
他是另一个部门的同事，大家都说他喜欢我，
因为年纪上有些差距（11岁），所以一开始我都有避忌，
害怕思想不同，害怕喜好不同，我想了很多，也顾虑很多……
但是我们渐渐有话题，接触多了，我尝试去接受，为他付出，为他努力。
但是，因为他的习惯自由，我的任性脾气，导致我们无法再走下去。
C先生，感情没有对错，我不会责怪或讨厌什么，
以前自由的你，无需向任何人报告行踪，报平安。
女朋友会想要知道你在哪？在干吗？
告诉你她心里有什么不高兴，有什么不满，有什么不喜欢的，
坦白告诉你了，你却认为是在发小姐脾气，
也许你不喜欢这样的关心，这样的相处方式，
为何？为什么你就憋在心里不说？
女方并不知道你的想法，一直都是女方在告诉你不喜欢什么，
而你却什么都没说过，只有女方一直在叽叽喳喳的。
因为不知道你在想什么，很多时候女方都在自己猜，自己想……
分开后又有误会，女方在你心目中变成了坏人。
放下了又如何？你却不愿意好好地相处，现在要避来避去。
我很累，我不喜欢这样的相处方式……
分开后的恋人真的不可以再做朋友吗？
有人会想用承诺去套牢一个人；
有人会想用行动去感动一个人；
有人会想用甜言蜜语去迷惑一个人。
然而，这个年纪的我（24岁），会害怕给承诺……
经历过失败的爱情，受过伤害。
所以害怕给，也害怕接受。
可是对它还是有一丝丝的期待，对感情还是有一股脑的热情，
想要表达出来让对方知道。
想想当初那股傻劲，其实很幸福。
自己为了这份感情执着过，
曾经为了彼此努力，但却不后悔这样付出，
这也是爱情令人着迷的地方。
在付出的同时，我们也得到了快乐，
只要看到对方轻轻一笑，心里就觉得很满足，
这一切努力都得到了一个小小的回报，就足够了。
其实，现在我有点害怕再去爱，
当初对爱情的那股期待的心情，
渐渐消失……
看到一段文字：
幸福是懂得原谅才开始的；
咖啡是一种容易上瘾的饮料；
感情是一种很难拒绝的吗啡，
一旦爱上就很难戒掉。
这段话说得蛮有道理的，
以前不喝咖啡的我，最近深深地爱上它。
我有3段感情（K先生），
第1段有3年，他是我在学会里透过朋友认识的。
我跟他经历了很多，虽然不同校，但是我们都会一起做功课，
他也是我的小老师，在课业上帮了我不少，所以那一年，我的功课进步很多。
在KK念书的时候，因为彼此念不同科系，
要一起讨论功课有点困难，大家的科目不一样，
我只好自己努力，加把劲！
后来因为没办法升上第二学年，我放弃了学业，回到家乡，
我们就这样分隔两地。
渐渐地，因为分隔两地，彼此的感情变淡，就这样选择分开。
第2段有接近2年（A先生）（1年11个月吧），
他是我哥的朋友，也是我的同事，
他很疼我，也很照顾我，但是我真的很抱歉，伤害了他……
对不起……（这段就不多说了……）
至于第3段（C先生），
是最短的一段，只有短短的两个星期，却是我最深刻的一段。
（也是我第一次会向妈妈提起的一段）
他是另一个部门的同事，大家都说他喜欢我，
因为年纪上有些差距（11岁），所以一开始我都有避忌，
害怕思想不同，害怕喜好不同，我想了很多，也顾虑很多……
但是我们渐渐有话题，接触多了，我尝试去接受，为他付出，为他努力。
但是，因为他的习惯自由，我的任性脾气，导致我们无法再走下去。
C先生，感情没有对错，我不会责怪或讨厌什么，
以前自由的你，无需向任何人报告行踪，报平安。
女朋友会想要知道你在哪？在干吗？
告诉你她心里有什么不高兴，有什么不满，有什么不喜欢的，
坦白告诉你了，你却认为是在发小姐脾气，
也许你不喜欢这样的关心，这样的相处方式，
为何？为什么你就憋在心里不说？
女方并不知道你的想法，一直都是女方在告诉你不喜欢什么，
而你却什么都没说过，只有女方一直在叽叽喳喳的。
因为不知道你在想什么，很多时候女方都在自己猜，自己想……
分开后又有误会，女方在你心目中变成了坏人。
放下了又如何？你却不愿意好好地相处，现在要避来避去。
我很累，我不喜欢这样的相处方式……
分开后的恋人真的不可以再做朋友吗？
Thursday, September 25, 2014
Tuesday, September 23, 2014
100天
距離2015年只剩下100天了，
你的目標達成了嗎？
今年我成長了，我認真跪在衘本尊面前唱題。
以前的我很懶惰，只是出席學會活動才有唱題。
唱題讓我的生活沒那麼緊張，
讓我有智慧和勇氣去面對問題和煩惱。
感謝衘本尊和諸天善神的守護。
我漸漸放下了該放下的，
很多事情都看得比較開。
今年看到了很多事，是很不錯的經驗。
祈求接下來都能夠順利通過。
至於你，我會繼續祈求，
祈求你有自信的過每一天，不要再鑽牛角尖了，好嗎？
Monday, September 22, 2014
我已經沒辦法了…
事到如今，你還是覺得我是個廣播，在散發謠言。
我無能為力，我們之間的信任竟然那麼的淺。
你已經不是當初我認識的你，
當初的你，在去KL的時候，失踪了…
我只能夠這樣想，因為我真的不想認為你是壞人…
說真的，現在我們像陌生人一樣，我很辛苦…
為什麼不可以重新開始一段朋友的關係？
我知道你不想跟我有接觸，我一直都避你三分…
但是我真的很辛苦…這樣的日子還要到什麼時候…？
Sunday, September 21, 2014
面子
每个人都会爱面子吧？
但是我承认自己有时候的确是很厚脸皮。
（有时候为了争取自己想要的东西，厚脸皮一点又何妨？）
其实当初，我有发现他说谎，但是为了让他有个台阶下，所以我没有拆穿他。
加上那其实也不是什么很严重的大话，所以我选择相信和不拆穿。
我相信了他又如何？他还是认为我到处搬弄是非说他的坏话……
好像放不下的是你吧……？
但是我承认自己有时候的确是很厚脸皮。
（有时候为了争取自己想要的东西，厚脸皮一点又何妨？）
其实当初，我有发现他说谎，但是为了让他有个台阶下，所以我没有拆穿他。
加上那其实也不是什么很严重的大话，所以我选择相信和不拆穿。
我相信了他又如何？他还是认为我到处搬弄是非说他的坏话……
好像放不下的是你吧……？
Thursday, September 18, 2014
青春是希望的别名
不管你如今是四十、五十或六十，只要有无限的希望，就有《 永远的青春 》。
歌德胸中充满希望之光，因此坦言自己过了《 八十二年青春的日子 》。
愿各位都拥有一生的青春、《 永远的青春 》。
国际创价学会会长池田大作
歌德胸中充满希望之光，因此坦言自己过了《 八十二年青春的日子 》。
愿各位都拥有一生的青春、《 永远的青春 》。
国际创价学会会长池田大作
戰勝自己才是命運的強者
人生最強大的敵人就是自己，
最大的挑戰就是挑戰自己，
任何失敗都是源自於內心的崩潰。
最大的挑戰就是挑戰自己，
任何失敗都是源自於內心的崩潰。
每個成功都從挑戰自己開始，去戰勝自己。
這是因為其他周圍任何的事物都容易戰勝，
唯獨自己是最難戰勝。
這是因為其他周圍任何的事物都容易戰勝，
唯獨自己是最難戰勝。
一個人要挑戰自己，靠的不是投機取巧，不是耍小聰明，
靠的是努力，磨練的信心，絕對不能敗給自己的人生。
靠的是努力，磨練的信心，絕對不能敗給自己的人生。
人有了鍛煉自己的信心，就會產生堅強的意志力量。
成功與失敗之間最大的差異就在於意志力量的差異。
人一旦有了意志的力量，就能戰勝自身的各種弱點。
人一旦有了意志的力量，就能戰勝自身的各種弱點。
一個人有了信心，有了意志力量，
就具備了敢挑戰自己的素質，
就能做成在這個世界上是《人》能做的任何事。
就具備了敢挑戰自己的素質，
就能做成在這個世界上是《人》能做的任何事。
Wednesday, September 17, 2014
你要振作
你為何要這樣放棄自己？
你忘了嗎？
你說你媽媽生你的時候很辛苦，就算你不為自己著想，也想一想你的母親。
你這樣的想法，她心裡是有多麼的痛…
你每天就是毫無目標的過著生活，
就連自己的未來也沒有好好地計劃和打算，
每天就這樣上班下班，
難道你甘心就這樣一直下去嗎？
你以後的生活怎麼辦？
就算你是個不婚主義者，你也要想一想身邊關心你的人，想一想未來的日子。
你嘴上說不在意，問問你的心，其實你心裡很在意那位算命先生說的話。
難道你就要這樣放棄自己？
你繼續這樣下去就是輸了!!
Tuesday, September 16, 2014
Monday, September 15, 2014
心疼
你丫!! 你你自己了解你自己嗎？
你覺得你會害人？
旁觀者清，你不會害人，你只是有時候不懂得如何跟別人相處。
你會活在自己的世界，整個人會進去小說故事裡面，旁人跟你說話，你都聽不進去。
你簡直就已經是小說裡的一個路人甲。
你是不會有害人的心。
依我看，你是沒膽!!
你沒有膽量踏出那一步；
你沒有勇氣去面對；
你甚至沒有去找出問題的根源，然後解決它。
你只知道活在自己的世界，雖然有句話是說：我的事與你無關。
但是，你有想過關心你的人的感受嗎？
你知道她/他們有多心疼嗎？
大家為了顧及你的感受，沒有多問什麼，
只要你喜歡，你愛怎樣就怎樣…
她/他們看在眼裡，痛在心裡…
你好過嗎？
不管你block不block，反正我就是不會找你。
你問問你自己，問問自己的心，
這樣的結果，你很開心嗎？
這樣的結果，你很開心嗎？
你討厭的人很多，看不順眼的人也很多，
心裡充滿怨恨和討厭，你心裡好過嗎？
心裡充滿怨恨和討厭，你心裡好過嗎？
你說我胡思亂想，那為何你自己不想一想，
你自己不也是在胡思亂想嗎？
你自己不也是在胡思亂想嗎？
你有努力過嗎？
你有為了要爭取自己想要的而去努力嗎？
你知道成功的滋味嗎？
你有為了要爭取自己想要的而去努力嗎？
你知道成功的滋味嗎？
老是說自己年紀大了，才不過35歲而已，
就已經那麼的沒有自信。
你要怎麼度過接下來的日子和歲月？
你忘了你自己說過什麼嗎？
你告訴我，我們可以改變自己的命運。
但是，你有行動嗎？你真的有努力嗎？
你有目標嗎？
就已經那麼的沒有自信。
你要怎麼度過接下來的日子和歲月？
你忘了你自己說過什麼嗎？
你告訴我，我們可以改變自己的命運。
但是，你有行動嗎？你真的有努力嗎？
你有目標嗎？
Sunday, September 14, 2014
戀愛是什麼？（英文版）
What is love ?
By Daisaku Ikeda
The agonies of love are many and varied. Each person has their own character and personality; they have different backgrounds and circumstances. So there is no set rule that applies equally to everyone . . .When a person dates is also a matter of personal choice. No one has any right to meddle in your private affairs.
However, I would like to stress at the outset how important it is not to lose sight of pursuing your own personal development.
Love should be a force that helps you expand your life and bring forth your innate potential with fresh and dynamic vitality. That is the ideal but, as the saying "Love is blind" illustrates, people often lose all objectivity when they fall in love.
If the relationship you're in is causing your parents to worry, or making you neglect your studies or engage in destructive behavior, then you and the person you're seeing are only being a negative influence and hindrance to each other. Neither of you will be happy if you both just end up hurting each other.
If you are neglecting the things you should be doing, forgetting your purpose in life because of the relationship you're in, then you're on the wrong path. A healthy relationship is one in which two people encourage each other to reach their respective goals while sharing each other's hopes and dreams. A relationship should be a source of inspiration, invigoration and hope.
Love is a complex matter that is a reflection of each person's attitude and philosophy toward life. That is why I believe people shouldn't get involved in relationships lightly.
The bottom line is that, without respect, no relationship will last for very long, nor will two people be able to bring out the best in each other.
Rather than becoming so love-struck that you create a world where only the two of you exist, it is much healthier to learn from those aspects of your partner that you respect and admire, and continue to make efforts to improve and develop yourself. Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, the author of The Little Prince, once wrote, "Love is not two people gazing at each other, but two people looking ahead together in the same direction." It follows then that relationships last longer when both partners share similar values and beliefs.
Furthermore, please don't succumb to the view that love is the be-all and end-all, deluding yourself that as long as you are in love, nothing else matters. Nor, I hope, will you buy into the misguided notion that sinking ever deeper into a painful and destructive relationship is somehow cool.
All too often when a relationship ends, the great passion it once inspired seems nothing more than an illusion. The things you learn through studying, on the other hand, are much more permanent. It is important, therefore, that you never extinguish the flame of your intellectual curiosity.
Far too many people nip their own brilliant promise in the bud because of their blind pursuit of love.
Much of daily life tends to be ordinary and unexciting. Making steady efforts day-to-day can be trying. It's not always going to be fun. But, when you fall in love, life seems filled with drama and excitement; you feel like the leading character in a novel.
But if you lose yourself in love just because you're bored, and consequently veer from the path you should be following, then love is nothing more than escapism. What you are doing is retreating into a dream world, believing that what is only an illusion is actually real.
Even if you try to use love as an escape, the fact is that the euphoria is unlikely to last for long. If anything, you may only find yourself with even more problems along with a great deal of pain and sadness. However much you may try, you can never run away from yourself. If you remain weak, suffering will only follow you wherever you go. You will never find happiness if you don't change yourself from within. Happiness is not something that someone else, like a lover, for instance, can give to you. You have to achieve it for yourself. And the only way to do so is by developing your own character and capacity as a human being; by fully maximizing your potential. If you sacrifice your own growth and talent for love, you will absolutely not find happiness. True happiness is obtained through fully realizing your own potential.
I would also like to add that to embark on a relationship as an escape from something is extremely disrespectful to both your partner and yourself.
Each of you has a precious mission that only you can fulfill . . . To neglect one's mission and seek only personal pleasure is a sign of selfishness. It is impossible for an egotistic, self-centered individual to truly love another person.
On the other hand, if you genuinely love someone, then through your relationship with them, you can develop into a person whose love extends to all humanity. Such a relationship serves to strengthen, elevate and enrich the inner realm of your life. Ultimately, the relationships you form are a reflection of your own state of life. The same is true of friendship. Only to the extent that you polish yourself now can you hope to develop wonderful bonds of the heart in the future.
Part 1- Excerpted from Discussions on Youth Vol. 1(SGI-USA, 1998)
By Daisaku Ikeda
The agonies of love are many and varied. Each person has their own character and personality; they have different backgrounds and circumstances. So there is no set rule that applies equally to everyone . . .When a person dates is also a matter of personal choice. No one has any right to meddle in your private affairs.
However, I would like to stress at the outset how important it is not to lose sight of pursuing your own personal development.
Love should be a force that helps you expand your life and bring forth your innate potential with fresh and dynamic vitality. That is the ideal but, as the saying "Love is blind" illustrates, people often lose all objectivity when they fall in love.
If the relationship you're in is causing your parents to worry, or making you neglect your studies or engage in destructive behavior, then you and the person you're seeing are only being a negative influence and hindrance to each other. Neither of you will be happy if you both just end up hurting each other.
If you are neglecting the things you should be doing, forgetting your purpose in life because of the relationship you're in, then you're on the wrong path. A healthy relationship is one in which two people encourage each other to reach their respective goals while sharing each other's hopes and dreams. A relationship should be a source of inspiration, invigoration and hope.
Love is a complex matter that is a reflection of each person's attitude and philosophy toward life. That is why I believe people shouldn't get involved in relationships lightly.
The bottom line is that, without respect, no relationship will last for very long, nor will two people be able to bring out the best in each other.
Rather than becoming so love-struck that you create a world where only the two of you exist, it is much healthier to learn from those aspects of your partner that you respect and admire, and continue to make efforts to improve and develop yourself. Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, the author of The Little Prince, once wrote, "Love is not two people gazing at each other, but two people looking ahead together in the same direction." It follows then that relationships last longer when both partners share similar values and beliefs.
Furthermore, please don't succumb to the view that love is the be-all and end-all, deluding yourself that as long as you are in love, nothing else matters. Nor, I hope, will you buy into the misguided notion that sinking ever deeper into a painful and destructive relationship is somehow cool.
All too often when a relationship ends, the great passion it once inspired seems nothing more than an illusion. The things you learn through studying, on the other hand, are much more permanent. It is important, therefore, that you never extinguish the flame of your intellectual curiosity.
Far too many people nip their own brilliant promise in the bud because of their blind pursuit of love.
Much of daily life tends to be ordinary and unexciting. Making steady efforts day-to-day can be trying. It's not always going to be fun. But, when you fall in love, life seems filled with drama and excitement; you feel like the leading character in a novel.
But if you lose yourself in love just because you're bored, and consequently veer from the path you should be following, then love is nothing more than escapism. What you are doing is retreating into a dream world, believing that what is only an illusion is actually real.
Even if you try to use love as an escape, the fact is that the euphoria is unlikely to last for long. If anything, you may only find yourself with even more problems along with a great deal of pain and sadness. However much you may try, you can never run away from yourself. If you remain weak, suffering will only follow you wherever you go. You will never find happiness if you don't change yourself from within. Happiness is not something that someone else, like a lover, for instance, can give to you. You have to achieve it for yourself. And the only way to do so is by developing your own character and capacity as a human being; by fully maximizing your potential. If you sacrifice your own growth and talent for love, you will absolutely not find happiness. True happiness is obtained through fully realizing your own potential.
I would also like to add that to embark on a relationship as an escape from something is extremely disrespectful to both your partner and yourself.
Each of you has a precious mission that only you can fulfill . . . To neglect one's mission and seek only personal pleasure is a sign of selfishness. It is impossible for an egotistic, self-centered individual to truly love another person.
On the other hand, if you genuinely love someone, then through your relationship with them, you can develop into a person whose love extends to all humanity. Such a relationship serves to strengthen, elevate and enrich the inner realm of your life. Ultimately, the relationships you form are a reflection of your own state of life. The same is true of friendship. Only to the extent that you polish yourself now can you hope to develop wonderful bonds of the heart in the future.
Part 1- Excerpted from Discussions on Youth Vol. 1(SGI-USA, 1998)
Saturday, September 13, 2014
痛彻心扉
痛，真的很痛……
原来我的礼物是垃圾……
而且还说了幸亏没把垃圾带回家……
我能够做什么？
你认为我在别的部门说你坏话？
你认为别人看你的眼神不一样是因为我？
你了解这位眼神不一样的同事吗？
我自己也吃了这位同事不少柠檬，是酸的……
她是一位把情绪放在脸上的人，
这一点，你知道吗？
她很直接，不爽就是不爽，生气就是生气，开心就是开心……
非常的直接，不跟你拐弯抹角，不带面具。
我还记得她最“臭”的脸，当时的我有点为难，
夹在上司和她之间……
那一阵子因为有她们，我才能熬过去，
她们逗我开心，跟我开爱玩笑。
对你，我很抱歉，如果她们真的开始对你不礼貌，对不起……
也许，因为我的诉苦，你在她们心目中成了坏人，负心汉。
我真的很抱歉……
我并不是要解释些什么，
因为我在你心目中已经是个坏人，
是个爱胡思乱想，搬弄是非的人。
不过，我真的希望你能放下种种的成见，
放松自己的心情。
你一直带着怨恨和讨厌的心情，你开心吗？
你快乐吗？你轻松吗？
你要生气我，讨厌我，无所谓。
我只希望你能够开心，打从心里面笑出来的开心，
好吗？
种种的误会，已经拉远了我们的距离……
只可以靠时间冲淡这一切，误会能不能够解开，无人知晓……
原来我的礼物是垃圾……
而且还说了幸亏没把垃圾带回家……
我能够做什么？
你认为我在别的部门说你坏话？
你认为别人看你的眼神不一样是因为我？
你了解这位眼神不一样的同事吗？
我自己也吃了这位同事不少柠檬，是酸的……
她是一位把情绪放在脸上的人，
这一点，你知道吗？
她很直接，不爽就是不爽，生气就是生气，开心就是开心……
非常的直接，不跟你拐弯抹角，不带面具。
我还记得她最“臭”的脸，当时的我有点为难，
夹在上司和她之间……
那一阵子因为有她们，我才能熬过去，
她们逗我开心，跟我开爱玩笑。
对你，我很抱歉，如果她们真的开始对你不礼貌，对不起……
也许，因为我的诉苦，你在她们心目中成了坏人，负心汉。
我真的很抱歉……
我并不是要解释些什么，
因为我在你心目中已经是个坏人，
是个爱胡思乱想，搬弄是非的人。
不过，我真的希望你能放下种种的成见，
放松自己的心情。
你一直带着怨恨和讨厌的心情，你开心吗？
你快乐吗？你轻松吗？
你要生气我，讨厌我，无所谓。
我只希望你能够开心，打从心里面笑出来的开心，
好吗？
种种的误会，已经拉远了我们的距离……
只可以靠时间冲淡这一切，误会能不能够解开，无人知晓……
Friday, September 12, 2014
Monday, September 8, 2014
中秋
中秋节快乐！！
你吃月饼了吗？
你的房间应该可以清楚看到月亮吧？
最近看你眼睛有点红肿，样子看起来疲惫，
我想，你应该是不够睡吧？
问了同事，最近你的确是翻来覆去，无法入睡。
我不知道你的习惯有没有改变，
回到家还是少点看电脑吧……
睡前可以做些简单的体操，可以帮助你入眠，
喝点牛奶或蜜糖，让心情放松些。
不要再想东西了！！
你总是很多东西要想，让你的脑袋休息休息吧……
也让你的心空些……
有烦恼的话，不妨试试写写日记，懒惰写的话，可以用打的，
在部落格也好，随便开一个档案也好，
至少不要一直憋在心里，
放出来，会让你心情好些……
（我都是这样熬过这段时间的，因为不想再让身边的人担心）
加油！！
你吃月饼了吗？
你的房间应该可以清楚看到月亮吧？
最近看你眼睛有点红肿，样子看起来疲惫，
我想，你应该是不够睡吧？
问了同事，最近你的确是翻来覆去，无法入睡。
我不知道你的习惯有没有改变，
回到家还是少点看电脑吧……
睡前可以做些简单的体操，可以帮助你入眠，
喝点牛奶或蜜糖，让心情放松些。
不要再想东西了！！
你总是很多东西要想，让你的脑袋休息休息吧……
也让你的心空些……
有烦恼的话，不妨试试写写日记，懒惰写的话，可以用打的，
在部落格也好，随便开一个档案也好，
至少不要一直憋在心里，
放出来，会让你心情好些……
（我都是这样熬过这段时间的，因为不想再让身边的人担心）
加油！！
Sunday, September 7, 2014
出不來…
因为，我们都经历过最透彻的痛，所以，我们不容易相信，也很没安全感...
我不懂你是怎么想的，但是我想对你说的是，对你，我是毫无保留的去相信，去信任，
而最重要的一点是，我不会对你有所防备...
因为你给予我的，是一份难能可贵的感情，更是特别值得珍惜的一份感觉，
这就是如今我想和你说的话...
希望，我的存在，能够驱除你此刻心里的不安，我更自私的希望，
我可以永远都是你放在心里疼惜的那一个...
我不懂你是怎么想的，但是我想对你说的是，对你，我是毫无保留的去相信，去信任，
而最重要的一点是，我不会对你有所防备...
因为你给予我的，是一份难能可贵的感情，更是特别值得珍惜的一份感觉，
这就是如今我想和你说的话...
希望，我的存在，能够驱除你此刻心里的不安，我更自私的希望，
我可以永远都是你放在心里疼惜的那一个...
我的人已經走出來了，但心還在那裡…
Friday, September 5, 2014
痛
当有一天，我不再想对你说话的时候，
那就意味着，我已经让自己一步步退出你的世界了...
只是，我不希望有那么一天的到来，
因为这对你对我来说，都是一个痛...
我不懂你是否可以把我拉着，
把我拉回来好吗？
因为我不想毁了我们之间的那一份感觉...
其实，我一直都在你身后，就差你一个回头…
那就意味着，我已经让自己一步步退出你的世界了...
只是，我不希望有那么一天的到来，
因为这对你对我来说，都是一个痛...
我不懂你是否可以把我拉着，
把我拉回来好吗？
因为我不想毁了我们之间的那一份感觉...
其实，我一直都在你身后，就差你一个回头…
Thursday, September 4, 2014
Wednesday, September 3, 2014
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